Flawed by Felicity Brandon

Author:Felicity Brandon [Brandon, Felicity]
Language: eng
Format: epub
Published: 2019-05-06T23:00:00+00:00

She hadn’t come to him, but in a strange way, he was glad. He’d always loved their nights together, here in his father’s old sitting room, but the compulsion he’d experienced yesterday had shaken him to the core, and Ethan needed time to be alone in his mind—time to think. Ever since he’d met Lily, the urge to take another and kill had diminished, fading to a point where he’d felt certain he no longer needed that anymore. He didn’t need that darkness to survive. Lily filled that ominous void with her light. Yet seeing Jody yesterday had changed all that in a flash, and for the life of him, he couldn’t understand why.

He’d barely given any thought to Jody before, and while he recalled her from that first night on the empty street, all he really remembered was how she had tried to flaunt herself—pushing herself in front of Lily after he’d sent the other guys packing. He’d listened to some of the stories Lily had told him about her friend, the appetite she had for men and parties, and he sensed that Jody didn’t appreciate his presence much. He was, after all, the man who had come between her and Lily, but it had never bothered him much. So, what had happened to change things? What had been different? Yes, things had been unsettled with Lily, but that couldn’t have been enough to allow the darkness back in, so what was different?

Nothing was different.

It was the knowing little voice in his head that answered, a strange realization when Ethan was already alone inside the place his mind created in sleep, but even here it seemed he wasn’t free of its cruel self-analysis.

Wait, what? Ethan turned, trying to get a handle on that voice—trying to understand it—to control it, the way he always controlled things, but for the life of him he couldn’t figure out where it had come from.

I said, nothing was different, it repeated in an absurdly smug tone. Nothing changed, Ethan, and you know it. You’ve just been able to spend the last few weeks hiding behind Lily’s light, but that’s it. You haven’t changed, and neither has your desire. Did you really think a few kinky nights of spanking and submission would be enough to satiate your appetite?

The tirade paused for a moment, but it didn’t help. The words were still echoing around his mind like the resonance of Christmas fucking past, and try as he might, he just couldn’t get past them. Ethan lifted his hands to his temples, rubbing hard at the cold flesh there. What the fuck was going on? Was he having conversations with himself now?

This needed to stop.

He inhaled deeply, trying to lower himself into a meditative state of mind. He rarely had to do this in his dreams. They were usually reasonably tranquil, and since Lily, they’d been an absolute joy, but at that moment, it seemed the only sensible thing to do.

You can’t hide from me, Ethan.

The voice was back, with a new, even more irritating sing-song quality than it’d had before.

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